Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

A dancer walks into a barre

What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

What colour is a black man in a freezer black

A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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