Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

thumb_up thumb_down +13

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why couldn't the little boy see? His eyes were closed.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's better than a stick? A stone

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops