why did the boy cry because i punched him so hard in the face he shit out his teeth for the next three weeks

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

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All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

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Your mama's so stupid that i wouldn't be surprised if you were to tell me that she didn't graduate high school.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh

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Roses are red violets are blue make me a sandwhich so i can eat it

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"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

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whats the difference between Whitney Huston and rubber duck? The rubber duck dosent smoke crack. hmm to soon?

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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What did the child molestor do? He went home and molested children.

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A Jew, A black, and a Hispanic jump off a building. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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How do you stop a cat from urinating on your floor? Shoot it.

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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A black guy, a jew, and an asian walk into a bar, have a beer each, and then leave, because they have high-paying jobs and don't want to risk getting DUIs.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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A blonde walks into a bar. She got free drinks.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a fish? A hot fillet.

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What's the opposite of a joke? An Anti-Joke.

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How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

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What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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What do you get when you cross a pug and a beagle? A cross pug and a cross beagle.

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Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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