guess what? bannanas

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Wanna hear a joke? no

thumb_up thumb_down +15

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Gay rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops