What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

Did you know that if you write "Beatles" on a piece of paper, chop it up, put it in some cabbage soup, eat the soup, poop it out in a cup, and put the paper back together, it spells "Ringo <3 Arby's"?

Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

you know whats funny?! nine eleven!

What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

This Haiku is strange There is a dinosaur WOW Snuffleupagus

Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road? To End His Suffering On The Farm. Suicidal Mission.... Complete

How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

What's a Mexican's favourite sport? Cross-country running.

Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!!!! lolooloL!OL!olO!LO!Lo!l!LO!L!O11P!lOL!oO!l

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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