Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

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Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he has no arms.

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What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

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What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

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Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

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Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

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want to hear a yo mama joke sure Your dad

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What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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Waseem is such a hard worker on Anti Joke all day.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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