Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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A hill billy went fishing

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. YO YO YO I F U C K YOU ALL!

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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The american education system.

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

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An Irish man walks into a bar, and then realizes that he's walked into the wrong establishment (He was looking for an upscale restaurant.)

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Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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LOVING BIRD DIEING BIRD DO NOT FLY AWAY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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