What do a pizza man and a gynecologist have in common? They are both hardworking members of the community!

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Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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In Soviet Russia, people commonly suffered under the might of the communist juggernaut. It was unpleasant.

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[Insert anti-joke here]

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

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You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

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News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

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Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

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whatdumb and gay stewart price

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What did Stephen Hawking say to his daughter? Nothing, his illness prevents him from talking. And letting a high-tech wheelchair make human sounds isn't talking!!!

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Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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