Roses are red Violets are blue Not all poems rhyme Penis

Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What will it be tonight?" He then promptly remembers he is on anti-joke.co but is too late to react. The horse has already shit on the floor. This is the fifth time this week that this has happened.

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack edition. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And then does not even have four quarters to his name.

What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

- What's better than just sitting on a couch in a summerhouse with a bottle of wine and reading a good book? - An orgy.

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

Whats worse than being a black guy? NOTHING.

orange -banana and lemon say....... i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i want to eat u (RANDOMZZZZZ)

Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

What do you call a dog with no legs? What ever you want, its still not going to come.

Bradley is Sexi;P just kidding!!! fatty

How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

A Chinese man fails a math test

Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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