How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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Yo momma so stupid she scored poorly on her SAT's in high school. She couldn't graduate college and now works a dead end job as a waitress.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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your mom is so fat that when she walks in America with a yellow coat as they get a taxi

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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there once was a frog with no leggs

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A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

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A coyote walks into a bar, because human development has rapidly destroyed his natural habitat. He mauls three patrons.

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knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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