A woman stopped making sandwiches.

What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

Why did John get hard? He froze to death

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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