What did the woman say when her boyfriend asked her to marry him? Idk my bff jill.

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Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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A man didn't feel well so he went to the toilet. He had explosive diahrria, then felt better.

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How do you stop an aboriginal from drowning? Take your foot off his head...

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the person above me ^ lost his virginity to a howler monkey and the person below me was his gay friend untill he found out about his recent run in with a howler monkey and does not wish the same fait as he does.

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Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Getting voted down to page 4067

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Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

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Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

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What's better then 100 dead babies in a barrel 1 dead baby in 100 barrels

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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