Whats green and fluffy? Your mom.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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What's white, wet, and loved by women? A polar bear cub.

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A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

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What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

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Why did the Hispanic man have drugs in his pocket? He had just gone to the pharmacy.

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How do you know when an elephant is in your refrigerator Theres printson the cheese cakes

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Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

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What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

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Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

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Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

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T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

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I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Why are women such horrible drivers? Their hair gets in the way.

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what's worse than a dead baby? a pile of dead babies. what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath. what's worse than a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath? the live one has to eat it's way out. what's worse than a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath that has to eat it's way out? more dead babies dumped on the already existing pile. what's worse than the giant pile of dead babies with a live one underneath that has to eat it's way out, but there are more dead babies piled on top? this is all in your basement.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

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what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

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Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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