Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

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Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

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You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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