How does a black man laugh? He schuckles

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Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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A father and his son get into an accident and are whisked away to the hospital. The father dies, and the son is brought into surgery. The doctor is rushed in, but looks at the boy and says "I can operate on this boy, his my son." How is this possible? The boy's father was a zombie.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then transported by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their eventual mass execution.

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What did your Little brother get for Christmas? Lice.

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

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What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

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What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

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How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

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Yo momma's so hairy when you were born you almost died from rug burn.

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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