whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

why did the circus boy not do his homework? because he was in a coma.

A dead guy walks into a grave.

How did little jimmy survive the plane crash? He ate all the survivors, then when the helicopter arrived he ate them too and took the helicopter.

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

A man goes to the potty.

What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

What happened to the child who's mother drank and took drugs while she was pregnant? Dead.

What did Hitler say when he was dying? He said, "I'm dying."

Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

How many people does it take to paint an elementary school red? 27.

I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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