To clowns walk into a bar. They don't notice each other because as soon as they walk to a 5-yard radius, the length that was said to be the range of a clowns eyesight (which was actually said by a controversial scientist, looked on as a madman; he created a whole clown-eyesight-range conspiracy), when a fire starts, creating a huge apocalyptic event. However, the two clowns go into the bar unphased. Both clowns then turn opposite directions. The clown on the right sits down with his drink and takes out his book about the Victorian Era. He constantly checks his watch. The clown on the left disapears into the croud, and steals french fries from table 36. After three hours, they both walk to the back of the bar, simultaneously tying their shoes not noticing their similarity in career choices. They both open a door marked PRIVATE (while tying their shoes). After sixteen days of exactly the same thing happening repeatedly... Both clowns see eachother on the way out of the bar. Little do the know that they are being watched by the scientist I mentioned earlier. Two Years Later Both clowns die instantly after being attacked by a giant war hammer-wielding octopus on the way home from the circus.

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"what did the priest say to the rabbi?" "what" "my religions better

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What do you say to a confused blond? You help her with her conundrum.

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What do you call three black guys in a bar? A bar.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

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Why couldn't the man get a job at the daycare? Because he was a serial killer/rapist.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

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A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

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Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

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Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

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A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was among thousands of men who were also from Nantucket.

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My spelling is horrible

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Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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Roger D. ASS , stops, has a ponder , and walks out of a s.t.i clinic ,without being seen

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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