Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

thumb_up thumb_down

whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the mexican say to the black guy? He asked if he needed some drugs. Why? He was a pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q:Whats 2+2? A: 4

thumb_up thumb_down

My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Michael Jackson become white? Because he likes to molest children.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the kid with turrets CHEESE! say to his mom.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

thumb_up thumb_down

what does a horny frog say RUBIT RUBIT

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Julia fall of the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Julia.

thumb_up thumb_down

Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

thumb_up thumb_down

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

thumb_up thumb_down

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

thumb_up thumb_down

Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops