What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

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How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

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There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman. They are all trapped in a jail cell. Eventually they all starved to death.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

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A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

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What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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YODO (unless you're religious background encourage you to believe in an afterlife of some sort, be it of animalia or homo sapien decent.

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What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

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Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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its all shi.ts and giggles.... ......until someone giggles and s.hits

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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What's more likely to happen in 2011 than the rapture? Finding my real parents.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

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What looks like midnight and is addicted to shemale porn? Xavier Jordan! Courtesy of Mrs. Maxwells 7th period

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you know whats funny?! nine eleven!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops