A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

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Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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Why did the man fart? He didn't. Stop being so dirty-minded.

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why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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A bunch of nuns were riding a three-seat bicycle. The seats were comfy and no one complained.

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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What's brown and smells like shit? Brown colour. I'm synesthetic.

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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Why are you on this sight? You're procrastinating. I am too

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What's black, white, and red all over? And interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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Want to hear what's totally out of this world? Not wasting a whole page of space for something that doesn't even vaguely resemble a joke. [L]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops