what did the guy say to the goose? i know you don't understand but my life sucks. my wife just dumped me for another man and my kids hate me. thank you. you are the only one to understand.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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What do you call a leper in a spa bath? Say excuse me Sir (or Madam), I notice you have leprosy, did you know that it is treatable? MDT for multibacillary leprosy consists of rifampicin, dapsone, and clofazimine taken over 12 months. Dosages adjusted appropriately for children and adults are available in all primary health centres in the form of blister packages.[17] Single dose MDT for single lesion leprosy consists of rifampicin, ofloxacin, and minocycline. The move toward single-dose treatment strategies has reduced the prevalence of disease in some regions, since prevalence is dependent on duration of treatment. World Leprosy Day was created to draw awareness to leprosy and its sufferers

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What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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What's the best thing about Windows OS? It's very versatile and can run a wide selection of programs, tools, and games.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

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Roses are red Violets are blue classic

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How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

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Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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whats the difference between kids and jewish people? kids come home from summer camp

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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