Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

You die of loss of blood, under a pile of first-aid kits

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

A black man walks up to a white man, and the black man says YO DIGGITY DAWG WASSAP FO DRIZZLE PLAYA BEEP BOBOTY BOP. And the white man stands there, confused as to what the black man said.

someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

The Pope, a Rabi and an Islamic religious leader go into a room and come out with what? A new understanding of each others cultures.

Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

someone called someone else a frog

Granny P-O-R-N!!!!

THE LOVE SHACK IS A LITTLE OLD PLACE WHERE WE CAN GET TOGETHER!

What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

Why did the duck walk on the moon? Because it was his lifelong goal

Q) A Christian, slightly disabled but perfectly capable man has a packet of Jaffa Cakes. He strolls casually toward the edge of a cliff, rapidly checking his watch. The man slowly examins the packet before gradually opening the packaging. First the box, then the packet. He quickly throws the jaffa cakes over the edge of the cliff, Why? A) The man doesnt like jaffa cakes

What do you call a girl with no arms and legs? Whatever her name is.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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