If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +22

2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a black man carrying a T.V? Someone that is helping me move.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A Jew buys something that is not on sale

thumb_up thumb_down +20

If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why didn't the boy have any pockets on? He didn't have any pants on

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops