Why could'nt Susie talk? The mafia cut out her tounge

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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Yo momma is so fat, when she wears a bathing suit, people are like, wow, that woman is fat.

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the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

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Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Exactly what he had asked for because UNICEF do a wonderful job.

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When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

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What's long and hard on a black man? Second Grade

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

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Your mom is so fat, that your gonna get a brother soon.

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You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

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You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

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What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

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How many blondes does it take to walk into a bar? One I guess. I don't know if I understand the question.

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What's long hard and full of seamen? A boat, or possibly a submarine.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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