What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

Whats Pink and fluffy? Yellow fluff thats been dyed pink :D

Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

A:Knock knock B:Who´s there? A:Beat B:Beat who? A:Beat your ass if you don´t open that door!!

What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

Barak Obama, Justin Bieber, and Lindsey Lohan all jump out of a plane. all of their parachutes deploy. except Justin Bieberrs, he then dies of cancer

Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

Don't read this or I'll be angry ...…...... Darn you...

Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

"What's up?" "A movie about an old man who takes his house to South America by tying balloons to it, who accidentally brings along a young boy with him and they have an adventure."

"Lassie, Lassie, come quick! Timmy is in the well!" "I'm a dog," replies Lassie. "You folks have ropes, ladders, and opposable thumbs. What the hell could I possibly do to help?" With that final act of disobedience, Lassie was turned into fertilizer.

What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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