What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

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Who row's? •Liam Findlay

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What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

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What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

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What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

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How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

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If i wanted your 2 cents i'd rob you

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what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

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What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the patient with narcolepsy? It wasn't. The patients were treated due to moral obligations. But the doctors that laughed had either been fired or warned, depending on if there were previous reports of exploitation of patients.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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