Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

knock knock who's there? your mom your mom who? I'm sorry to tell your mom is dead :.(

Did you know that if you write "Beatles" on a piece of paper, chop it up, put it in some cabbage soup, eat the soup, poop it out in a cup, and put the paper back together, it spells "Ringo <3 Arby's"?

Where's my baby??

what do you call a pie in a roll a roll and pie

This is the funniest joke in the world: Just joking!

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

Q: what did Katy Perry say when someone told her that she was adaopted? A: That's not true, my parents took pictures of me in the hospital just minutes after I was born.

A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

Do you know what lmnop is? No. A group of five consecutive letters.

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

Knock Knock Who's There? Betty Betty Who Betty Sue Never heard of ya I'm here from the management. You have a present. I don't care, we don't take kindly to you city folks. But Sir, If you don't take this I will have to ask you to leave. Well what is it. It's your bill. Knock knock Who's there? Cowabunga! Cowabunga Who? Moo Moo alalalalalal woohoo i'm so high

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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