Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

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Have ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither has she.

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One, two, three, four and five

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What did Reed read? A. Read?

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Why is our country going downhill? Because going uphill is harder.

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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what did the little boy say to his sibling? dat not funny!

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

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Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

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Whay lawrence pearson ir r8 gay

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How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

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Q: Why did the black man drown? A: Because he couldn't swim.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

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What do you call a chicken? You say bawk bawk bawk bawk cockadoodledoo

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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