justin bieber walks into a bar, he is then kicked out because he's under age.

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

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What do you call a red ballon? It depends on its color duh!

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

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Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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Mother Mary held her daughter 20 minutes under water. Not to save her from her troubles, just to see the funny bubbles

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A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

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What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

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How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

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what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

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Equal rights!

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What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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why is brennan hart a dumbass idk ask his mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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