Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q:Why is the WMBA so unsuccessful? A:Barely anyone watches it

thumb_up thumb_down +4

It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the little girl fall of the cliff? Someone pushed her

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops