I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

What is the difference between a black person and a bicycle? You can sell a bicycle legally.

Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

What is the worst thing to say to a dying person? After you die I'm going to defile your corpse, nan.

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

Q:Why is the WMBA so unsuccessful? A:Barely anyone watches it

Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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