Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man went skydiving and tragically died.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +6

"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops