Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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What's the difference between Timmy and a car? Timmy can be brutally murdered.

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whats the difference between samios and a dog? Nothing.

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why should you not go to sleep in public? Because that's how you get raped.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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Why wouldn't Rose let go of Jack? Freddie told her that he was just a poor boy and nobody loves him.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

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All of these jokes are about white people

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Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

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Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

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What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

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How far can a baby fly? As far as you can throw it.

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

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Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

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Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

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'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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