Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

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What happened to the old man at his suprise party? He died from the shock.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Roses are red Roses are white and I one time saw a purple one

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What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

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What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

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The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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