What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

Tony Romo

Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

Why did the plane to New York not land? It was redirected to Boston because of inclement weather.

Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

what's worse than pie? alot of things.

What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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