What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

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What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

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What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

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Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

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Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

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Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There Not Sally Why was the boy sad? Because he dropped his ice cream cone Why'd he drop his ice cream cone? Because he got ran over by a bus Why'd he get run over by a bus? BECAUSE SALLY WAS DRIVING

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Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, but if the ladder is shaky, you might need another to hold it up.

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

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Lil Wayne's song 6 foot 7 foot was named after my wewe

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

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today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Whose there? Obviously not Suzie.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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