How do you spell orange? O-R-A-N-G-E-U-D-U-M-B-A-S-S

What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

What do you get when two black men walk into a bar? A few salesmen celebrating their recent pay raise.

Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

A cat ran into the road...I hit it

What's worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The holoca- *the man hearing the joke then pulls out a desert eagle and shoots the man in the chest before finishing the joke then goes to jail for the rest of his life*

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

What's red and smells like blue paint? Fetus Blood. Due to the low concentration of iron, it gives it an aroma of paint.

Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

Whet doesn't kill you, probably will next time.

How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

Rylan Clark

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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