Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

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A dancer walks into a barre

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

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What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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