How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

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You are joking right?

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What do you call a bunch of black people at the bottom of the ocean? Cocoa puffs

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yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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What is the answer to this joke? Cuz fuck you that's why.

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Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? "How much?! No thanks, I think I'll shop around."

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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Whats 1+1? window!

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Why was the Jewish man celebrating cinco de mayo? Because he likes other cultures and Mexican food Except pork

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Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

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what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

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Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran Wrap? - "That's for food. You should wear clothes instead."

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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