My little league baseball coach measured the team for cups. Its 9 years later and we still dont have those cups.

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my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

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what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

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Why did the white girl become a lesbian? Because she was raped and had no more trust in the male gender.

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

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What's red and black and looks good on a Jew? A bullet wound.

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How many British people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the flashlight because the room is probably dark.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

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A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

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Why didn't the dog want to cross the road? there was a flea market on the other side.

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Why was the Mexican running? He was being chased by border patrol!

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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