Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

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What did the chicken say to the duck .... Nothing the chickin was Spanish and the duck was illiterate

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream. Because he got hit by a bus

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Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

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what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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What's the difference between Little Billy and Ice Cream? People like Ice Cream.

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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How do you make a clown cry? Hit him with a chair then rape his children

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David Cameron

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What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

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wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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What's worst then finding a worm in your apple Eating it.

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

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There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

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Q: Why God never got a PhD? A: 1. He had only one major publication. 2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English. 3. It has no references. 4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal. 5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself. 6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then? 7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited. 8. The Scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results. 9. He unlawfully performed not only Animal, but *Human* testing. 10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning his subjects. 11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample. 12. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book. 13. Some say he had his son to teach the class. 14. He expelled his first two students for learning. 15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students failed his tests. 16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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