What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

Why was the guy stupid? 'Cause he was!

What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

Chuck Norris threw a grendade, killed 50 people, then it exploded This is a highly improbable event considering no man is faster then a grenade

How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. On its way there, he got hit by a bus.

What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

How come dinosaurs don't talk? Because they're dead.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

You're mom is so slutty, she has sex with many men.

Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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