What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

Why did the black man jump off of a bridge? -He was in depression and comitted suicide.

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

Why did the spy cross the road? To get to the other hide.

How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

What do you call cheese that is not yours? It depends on the type of cheese.

How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

Knock knock. Who's there? Silence. Silence who? No, I meant there was silence, I didn't really say anything. Oh, OK. But seriously, who's there?

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then transported by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their eventual mass execution.

Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

i saw amango it splootered

What would you call the flinstones if they were black? Ni**gers

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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