Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

What do a raven and a writing desk have in common? I have no idea.

Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

kennah campion when she talks

How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

Richard Gere has a girlfriend called Goldie

Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

Why did Daniel Nitz cross the road during rush hour? Because he's an idiot.

Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. The mailman who? Anthrax.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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