Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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Crime in a hen house. All hens killed. Police found the suspected fox quickly and asked him if he have done it. No - he said. But it was him.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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How do you know if you're gay? You find yourself sleeping with people of the same sex.

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

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There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

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Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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Ok soo theres a Jewish Guy, a Christian Guy and a Gay Guy. The Jewish Guy goes Amen The Christian Guy goes Ámen The Gay Guy goes Ammeeeennn

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Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

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Did you hear about the Nun in the Twin Towers? Yeah, she died too

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Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

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Why couldn't the gay man grow a beard? He shaved his face frequently.

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What can fit between breasts? Is long? And gets hard when you jerk it? A seatbelt.

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steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

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What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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