Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

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What did the fish want to drink? Charlie Brown

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Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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Why are they the "living" daylights?

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Why did the man put his money in the freezer? hes retarded.

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

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What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

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A man walks into a bar. The force of the impact causes serious head trauma and kills him within a matter of minutes.

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

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what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

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why did the man get arrested? because he was a thief, and thieving is completely unacceptable in a civilised society

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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antonis sister is mighty fine

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Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

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your momma's so ugly that she currently deals with an overwhelmingly self consciousness view of her appearance to the point where she has contemplated suicide and it is in your best interest to seek her medical help in order to preserve her heath and overall well being.

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The global news

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What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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