You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

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Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

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Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

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men, men like men= men+bed

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Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

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A black man and a white man crash their cars. they promptly exchange insurance information and apologize to each other about the inconvenience.

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops