How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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i had a dream last night;) it was sad because you lived but then i dreamed up a bus and made it hit you. i had a dream last night;) you died

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people magazine

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

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A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse does not say anything because its a horse and horses cannot talk.

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Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

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Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

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Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

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Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

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A Christian and an atheist are in a bar. Neither one knows the other's religion and they continue to drink.

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My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

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What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

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What did the elf say to Santa I'm not making any more toys fat ass.

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why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

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Text Klarens at 317-653-8695. Tell him crazy shit or send crazy pictures.

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What does society have in common with laundry? They both get ruined when you mix colors with whites.

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What is the best thing the French ever invent The two piece

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A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

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knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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