What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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What do you get when you cross Skyrim and Call of Duty? A video game that has similarities to Skyrim and Call of Duty.

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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Why didn't Jane go to school last Thursday? It was summer. No one went to school last Thursday.

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knock knock whos their? kevin kevin who? knock knock huh? queef

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Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

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What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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Man U

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops