Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

I was having sex with thisgirl and now I'm going to be a dad. All because I didn't wear a condom

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

A man walks into a bar, he then gets a giant bump on his head as he passes out and is rushed to the hospital.

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

Why did the chicken cross the road? because

What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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