Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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A blonde dies Lololol

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

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What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

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A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

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Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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